Saturday, June 28, 2008

5 Things and Time ago

I felt like I needed something to replace my last post:

10 years ago: I was 22 years old. I had a 2 year old and we had moved away from our families to Vancouver. I loved being "home" and Joe didnt so we moved back to Kamloops,the next year.

5 years ago: I was working two jobs and living in our first real "owned home". And I was still recovering from the 3 surgeries on my ankle. And taking a break from the fertility game.

1 year ago: Life was pretty much the same as it is now. Frankie finishing school. Joe working. But we still lived in our own house.

Yesterday: I had alot of appointments,payed for the lawnmower to be fixed.Getting ready for Mom,dad and Joe to come home.

5 snacks I like: popcorn,chocolate,almonds,pop{why i can never loose weight}, sunflwer seeds

5 books I like to read: I love to read but havent done it much lately,People magazine,romance novels{Nora Roberts},a book on polgamy right now.Sears,Computer articles

5 foods I dislike: Tomatoes { but I will eat sauce,salsa,ketchup} just no chunks.Mushrooms{i do not even like the smell} Cooked them raw. Liver. Pizza Pops.

5 bad habits: Not sticking to a diet,biting my nails,to much snacks,skipping meals,not enough water

5 pet peeves: rudeness,cashiers who do not say hello,bragging,empty carton in the fridge,telemarketers

5 things I enjoy: my children,my cousins,when my children are happy,watching dancing,seafood{like I am having tonight}

5 TV shows I like: Young and the Restless{memories of when I used to watch it,with my Gramma} So You think You can dance.Jon and Kate plus eight{although I find Kate alittle to controlling} Amazing race.Reruns of Friends,everbody loves Raymond

5 people I would love to meet: Gordan Ramsey,Jon and Kate,this is hard. I would love to meet up with a few friends that I drifted apart from. Mostly because my life started so much sooner than theirs.

5 things I would never wear: bikini{even if I were skinny} tube top {same} pink{never,ever. I will have to tell you about my weird pink phobia one day}long socks,wool

Thats it, afew things about myself. One day I will have to do the 100 things about myself. But then this took me long enough!

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Hard week, but it is shaping up nicely

I have had a hard week. I think it may have been the hardest week of married life but, also groundbreaking.

The other night on the phone with Joe I lost it.To make a long long story short. I finally let my husband have it. Dont get me wrong, he loves me but honestly most of the time does a pretty crappy time of showing it. He is a man's man and I have always known this.But it was breaking me down little by little and I snapped. And after he finished with being angry and alittle nasty. I think it hit him that i was not kidding. {this did not all happen in one night}

I have let him know, that I need some understanding, compassion and decency in my life. And I will not be his or anyone elses punching bag any longer. And after it all I felt physically sick litterly.But also at a kind of peace.

Well, we are going to go to marrige conselling and without joe being forced. This is a major breakthrough for him. Usally tough guy would say it was for sissys.

Tonight was wonderful,we had a really nice conversation on the phone and for the first time in years i didnt feel like I was in "trouble" for something. Dont get we wrong i am not a total pushover, but I put up with alot of negative people in my life. And I find myself giving in alot. Well, not anymore because I owe to my daughter to show her the proper way for a woman to be treated.

Frankie did overhear some cause she was hiding on the stairs, but we had a wonderful talk and for the first time I was asked "are you guys getting a divorce". And it broke my heart. No I dont think we are, but honestly I finaly feel strong enough to say that if I feel that things are returning to old ways. I have enough strengh to ask for one. Which is sad in a way,but good in the way that I am reclaiming myself. Lets pray it never comes to that,because I love my husband. But I have to learn to love myself again.

Ok enough of the deep stuff, Frankie had a "no more miss ..... party". If you remember from a previous post that she had a pretty difficult teacher this year. So she had her 5 best gal pals over for a sleepover. It brings back so many memories. Only back then I didnt have my own digital camera, and half of the film would've been exposed. Girl Power!

Monday, June 16, 2008

Prices like Gold and Red Spots

We spent the Fathers Day weekend without any Fathers around.It seems like Joe is always working his two weeks on during any sort of holiday. He has missed all our birthdays, Easter,Thanksgiving,Halloween,Mothers Day and now Fathers day,this past year. But we try to celebrate on alternate days. We just always make sure he is home for Christmas. Although he did miss New Years. Maybe next year will work out differently.
We were talking though about how I never make him feel bad for missing these things. There are a couple wives of guys where he works, that make their husbands feel crappy about it.Phone them crying and everything. These guys have pretty stressfull jobs and do not need the added stress of things they cannot change. It is a hard life but they do it for their families and so we can for the most part stay home if we want.I appreciate what he does and I KNOW, I could never do it. Everytime he comes home he notices the kids have grown or their hair is longer. And especially all the new stuff Matteo comes up with. Anyway, Joe we appreciate you!

So, Friday we let Frankie skip the afternoon of school and we took Gramma with us. We dropped off daddy and went Chuckie Cheese,Winners and Tony Roma's for dinner. Was alot of fun but we got home really late. We had a double header soccer morning. And yippee Frankie scored a goal.

Then we went to Ituna for a community garage sale. OM Goodness, it was the funniest garage sales ever. Let alone most of it belonged in a dumpster!(literly)The rest was priced like gold,some of which were actually priced higher than retail.A couple examples,White Rain Tame shampoo in the older packaging selling for $5.00. Retail $2.49. A big durable but beat up kids slide $250.00 dollars. I said pardon me and had to turn around do hide my chuckles! What has happened to bargains.

Sunday, was uneventful except for Matteo got Hand,Foot Mouth Disease. Which after looking it up sounds much worse than it is. He didnt have a fever or anything just spots,that are now blistering.Other bloggers have said that when their kids have it, they vegged and slept alot.Not my kid of course,still full of hyper beans.Couldnt have had even alittle down time.LOL

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Dance Recital

Frankie had her recital this weekend, it was so good. She did awesome.It was a really good show this year the theme was All about town,because it it Melvilles Centennial this year. Frankies Jazz class preformed to "Carwash". They did a pyramid to loud cheers. Frankie was the bottom middle in the pryamid.
But to end the night on a sour note,someone stole my Sirius radio out of my van.The only took the main part, so it is of no use to them.But,when Joe went to report it, there was another mom from dancing there. She had her two little ones with her, and she was crying.She told Joe her digital camera,video camera and XM radio were stolen out of her vechicle.She said I dont care about any of it,but all my pictures are gone.Swimming lessons,Camping.Then I thought,and I was worried about my radio,that can be easily replaced.I hope by some miracle whoever took her camera would drop off the card at the postoffice or something. We live in such a small town it would get back to her.

Monday, June 2, 2008

Alyse, My niece

God, I love this little girl. Wish I could see her more. I pray more for her than any other person.

Her parents have both screwed up their lives so much. But she is still so well adjusted. I wish I could scoop her up and keep her safe.

She is my brothers daughter and he wont see her until next year. I hope she is enough to help him find his way.

Love you baby girl.